Gray? But It’ll Make You Look Old!
I’ve been toying with the idea of letting my natural hair color grow out for a while now. After all, I did it once before in my late 40s, and it was really no big deal. I was working in an office back then, and I don’t remember there being much fuss over my gray roots or two-toned hair. I said I’m giving my natural hair a go, and that was about it. I kind of liked it when it was all said and done. I remember having a very cool (at least I thought it was cool) silver streak framing my face in front. The rest was mostly “salt and pepper” with a lot more pepper than salt.
My natural hair in 2008 with sweet baby Caroline.
I wore my natural silver for about six or seven years, I think. I even did mother of the groom with my silvery slivers and sparkly sparkles when my son was married. Then one day, Joe and I were watching something on TV about how some women look younger than their age while others don’t. I casually asked, “Do you think I look younger than my age?” (Uh oh, loaded question!) Joe being Joe, honestly answered, “Well, your face looks younger than your age, but your hair makes you look older.” Ouch! The very next day, I went to the drugstore, bought a box of color, and colored my hair a rich chocolate brown. Apparently, I cared a lot about looking younger than my age. I was 53. That was eight years ago. So yes, do the math and you’ll know I’m now 61. It’s funny, because I don’t care if people know how old I am. In fact, I’m kind of proud of the fact that I’m 61. It gets me the senior discount at Publix every Wednesday. I wouldn’t go back to being 35 again if you paid me. That may be true, but our culture worships youth, and I grew up all of my 61 years in that culture. So while I may be proud of the fact that I’m 61, I sure don’t want to look like I am.
Parents of the Groom, 2004.
Mother of the Groom (and she has silver hair)!
Okay, then why am I starting down this transition road when I know at the end there will be at least some silver—maybe even a lot? (I like the word silver so much more than gray. Silver has value. It’s sparkly and shiny.) There are quite a few reasons, but for today, I’ll share just one. I’m curious! I haven’t seen my natural hair in eight years. If you’ve been coloring your hair for a long time, aren’t you even a little bit curious to know what your natural hair looks like? And maybe even more important, how it will look on you and how you’ll feel about it? I am, and I decided I want to find out.
I’ve already heard comments about how it will make me look older. That’s a risk I acknowledge, but I don’t intend to wear a “grandma” style. I’m hoping I can do shoulder-length silver waves—kind of messy, if you know what I mean. I always have this picture in my head of what my beautiful wavy hair will look like when it’s longer, but every time I’ve had it longer, well, I’ve had to readjust the picture in my head! Maybe when it’s silver it’ll be different. Anyway, I think the things that do make you look older are not taking care of your body and your skin. I’m hoping I don’t ever have a matronly body to wear with my silver hair. So there’s hairstyle, being fit, taking good care of your skin, wearing flattering colors, an up-to-date wardrobe, the right makeup—all fit together in the perception of age. It’s so much more than hair color. Silver is just a color, like brown, or blonde, or red.
Are you ready to see it? Here I am shortly after my last color appointment on August 19th. It never looks that dark and harsh to me when I look in the mirror, but well, here it is in living color.
And here I am now with three months of growing out my short cut under my belt. My wavy hair is getting to the point where I have wings sprouting everywhere. I never know what it’s going to look like from one day to the next, but it usually isn’t great. Look! You can barely see a little sliver of silvery white in front of my ear. This pic is one month to the day since my last color. Nothing too noticeable yet…
…unless I do this and then you see it in all its glory!
EEK! I’m doing this!
I think, among other things, I’m going to learn to be patient through this transition journey. Come on! Grow hair grow!
I am 62 and 4 weeks into my journey to natural hair. The first month has not been hard but know the tough months are probably ahead….. 🙂 Good luck with your transition!
Good luck to you, too! We’re right there together!
You look beautiful and fit. I can’t wait to see it mostly silver. Your right…if the face & skin look beautiful & radiant , and if the clothes aren’t matronly…you will be stunning whatever your age.
Thank you, Mary!
I love it! Can’t wait for the next one!
Want to join me??? ;o)
I loved hearing about what you’ve been thinking. You will look great no matter what your hair color. For me, I plan to remain a “blonde.” It definitely feels like the real me.
Thanks, Carol. I think it’s easier for blondes. Skin tone changes as you age and seems to be better complemented by light hair when you’re older, as in blonde or, for me, silver!
I think you will find when you are finished with your transition, the difference will be between nice looking (brown) and stunning (silver.) The growing out part may be hard because there does seem to be quite a difference between the silver and the reddish brown.
I grew my silvers out at age 61, too. (I’m now 62) I agree with you on the other things we do to look great, stay fit, take care of our skin, our wardrobe choices are super important. I couldn’t be happier with my silver, and with not spending wasted time at the hairdresser! I have better things to do.
Thank you, Cathy. Yes, I’m excited about the transition, but it’s not hard yet. I hope I can stay excited through the difficult parts to come. And next year, just like you, I’ll be able to say I love my silver! Congratulations on reaching the goal!
Nikki, I enjoyed reading your post. At 56, I have never colored my hair other than sun-in products when I was in my teens. Many times I have seen other women who colored their hair and wondered what I would look like but never had the courage to try it out. Besides that, my husband loves my silvery streaked hair. I think as women, we sometimes struggle with aging gracefully and the world around us screams that looking young is the most important thing. When I struggle, I try to remember that man looks at the outward appearance but God looks at the heart. I look forward to your future posts. Press on!!
Donna, I love your perspective. Good for you that you haven’t given in to the pressures of chasing youth. I absolutely agree with you that the important thing is the condition of the heart. I’m trying to keep Proverbs 16:31 in mind–Gray hair is a crown of glory; it is gained by living a godly life. (NLT) Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
I’m 62 and have been thinking about doing this for a couple of years. My last color was Sept 1. I’m having to color every 3 weeks now. My hair is long and medium brown with recent highlights to possibly help with the appearance of the grow out line and maybe not so frequent root coloring. I’m sick of this. I think I’ve decided to do it! You’re blog just gave me that extra encouragement that I needed. Here we go !!!
How awesome is that! I’m barely ahead of you so we can do this together. Here we go, Sandra!